Merilyn – Christian Edwards (Back 2nd from left )  with Mustard Seed Home Group
Mustard Seed Girls Choir prepare to sing “Great and Marvellous” at 2000 Millennium concert at Crofton Community Centre

“Great and Marvellous” featuring Lucy Stimpson and The Mustard Seed Girls’ Choir at Millennium Concert, Crofton Community Centre

The pop songs I had made up “converted” into enough Christian songs to complete our first album “I Look up to the Heavens” and also a lot for our second album “Love is the Way.”  When I had ran out of pop songs to convert I thought that was it – but no, something remarkable happened- I  was  sat down in my lounge reading the Book of Revelation and in Chapter 15 it said

“Great and Marvellous are Your deeds Lord God Almighty. Just and true are Your ways King of the Ages” and a tune came into my head- the words continue “Who will not fear You, bring glory to Your Name? For You alone are Holy. All nations will come and worship You, for Your righteous acts have been revealed.  You Lord will reign.” The tune in my head continued.  I really could not believe it, especially as I knew the tune was nice and melodic.

That evening I went to see Merilyn Christian- Edwards;  the wife of Michael,  the Holy Rood Vicar who had run the Alpha Course ( see blog April 3rd) Merilyn was leading a home group of people that had been on the Alpha Course – the home group was  called the Mustard Seeds;  same as  our charity.  I was already close to Merilyn and  earlier  had sought  her opinion on my  “ converted songs”  I remember singing one to Merilyn  with her then disturbing Michael in his office (something you did not do when he was preparing a sermon!) and then me having to sing to him.  Michael said something like “We will have to support you in this.”

Anyway I was in my car with Merilyn on the way to our Mustard Seed home group when I told her that I had made up a new song. After  singing “Great and Marvellous” to her in the car Merilyn said “That’s from the Lord.”  That was the start of God giving me songs – I suppose that so far there have been over 200.

It was decided that the churches of Stubbington should combine to produce a Millennium Concert and so as not to show any favouritism it was to be held on the “neutral ground” of The Crofton Community Centre’s Sports Hall. Someone asked if I had a suitable song for the occasion and I immediately thought of “Great and Marvellous.”  Nicola and Fiona Poustie were still at Crofton School  and part of Lucy Stimpson- Maynard’s School Choir that doubled up in our concerts as the Mustard Seed Girls’ Choir. Nicola and Fiona went on to front the Mustard Seed Soul Band in future concerts and in our musical “His Story.” They both have an amazing gift for harmony and worked out a harmony for “Great and Marvellous.”  I remember them doing this after- school one day in Crofton School’s Music Room Two.

So in 2000, or it may still have just been 1999 “Great and Marvellous” was performed unaccompanied by the Mustard Seed Girls’ Choir with Lucy singing the first verse. Unbeknown to me my colleague at school, Neale Gordon was recording the singing on his minidisk.  Although the acoustics in the Sports Hall were not good the recording came out remarkably well. John Hodgkinson processed it in his studio and it ended up being the last track on our second album “Love is the Way.” It is this week’s featured song.

In our forthcoming musical Risen! I have used some melodies from previous albums for some recitative.  The tune to “Great and Marvellous” is used when Jesus proclaims to His followers on a mountain in Galilee (Matthew 28) that “All authority in heaven and earth has been given to me- So go make disciples of all men, go and baptise them.” This “Great Commission” finishes with what I would say are the most reassuring words every spoken “Surely I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

So “Great and Marvellous” became the last track on our second album “Love is the Way.” “Love is the Way” was reviewed in a Christian music publication called “Cross Rhythms” and next blog I’ll tell you what was said.

First concert heart and soul concert Hereford concert HR 2 concert LIW concert roberta concert soteria concert St Marys concert You are rock concert

The First Ever Mustard Seed Concert celebrating the 90th Birthday of Mr Milliken – Mr Mill’s dad

“Heart and Soul” from album “Heart and Soul” featuring Mike Backhouse and the Mustard Seed Soul Band

I would visit Mr Milliken (Mr Mill’s dad) pretty regularly at his sheltered accommodation in Titchfield. We would pray together and I would sing him the latest song I had made up- he was always really encouraging but also always really honest (see blog April 17^th “Baptism.”)   I am not sure whose idea it was but on October 27^th 1998, Mr Milliken’s 90^th birthday, we held a special concert for him in Drama Room One of Crofton School. Lucy Stimpson sang and played piano – the audience was not the largest ever consisting  of just five people- Mr Milliken, Mr Mill, Mr Mill’s sister Joy and me.  It was a wonderful occasion with Lucy singing songs from our CD “I Look Up to the Heavens” plus some that had not yet been recorded.  It was the first of many concerts and musicals that Mustard Seeds have produced at places including Holy Rood Church, Stubbington- St Edmunds Church, Stubbington-  St Mary’s Church, Porchester-  Oasis  Church, Portsmouth-Hereford Cathedral, Hereford- Central Hall, Westminster-  Assembly Halls, Chichester- Ferneham Hall, Fareham -Theatre Royal, Portsmouth and King Theatre, Southsea.

Sometimes we would hold a concert to support a particular person, for example my good friend Roberta Cousins who is a missionary in Uganda. On other occasions it would be to promote a new CD such as “Love is the Way” or “Uplifted.”  The concerts were always headed by Lucy Stimpson, who by now had married David Maynard, and so had become Lucy Maynard- but for Mustard Seed Songs -Lucy Stimpson- Maynard.  We gradually added more musicians – Ross Gill, who later produced many of our albums, played acoustic guitar, Neil Elliott, Gaz Matthews and Andy Hertbertson,  bass, Ben Kennedy and Darren Lewis,  drums and later Matt Goffee,  trumpet. At one concert Matthew Sergeant played trombone (see blog Feb 13th“Encouragement”) The concerts also featured the Mustard Seed Girls Choir, who had been formed from the Crofton School  Choir taught by Lucy.

By this time Mustard Seed Songs was supporting young people who had taken time off from their studies to work voluntarily in the Third World.  Catherine Knight had been the first we had supported (see blog May 15^th) but now there were others such as her brother Tim working in Chile for Latin Link and Jez Field and Clare Townend working for Tearfund in Kenya (A future blog will tell the story of how James Townend, Clare’s brother, who had only just left Crofton, sang at this concert – he now sings the part of Thomas absolutely brilliantly in our musical Risen!)

I remember one Crofton girl asking if we could support her missionary work – the trouble was Lucy was pregnant with her first baby, Emily Rose, and so could not be part of a concert. By this time some of the girls from the Mustard Seed Girls Choir were in their late teens and were singing semi- professionally – Fiona and Nicola Poustie and Katherine Hands.  For the CD “Uplifted”  I had started to write some more upbeat songs influenced by the soul music I grew up loving and hearing at the Birdcage club (see blog Feb 6th)  So the time was now right to try a slightly new direction and Ross Gill produced, without Lucy,  our forth CD “Heart and Soul.”  On vocals were Nicola, Fiona, Kat and another ex- member of the Mustard Seed Girls’ Choir who was singing professionally – Katie Summer. Ross Gill was on guitar, Darren Lewis, drums, Chris Backhouse, keys and  Andy Herbertson,  bass. We also had guest vocalists Jassica Castillo- Burley and Mike Backhouse, Chris’ brother. Mike sang the title song “Heart and Soul” and, as he married Becky last weekend, I thought it would be nice to feature his song and of course wish them every  happiness together.

The “Heart and Soul” CD was first promoted at a Mustard Seed concert at The Oasis Centre in Arundel Street, Portsmouth.  We supported the charity founded by my great friend Mick Mellows – “Faith and Football.”  www.faithandfootball.org.uk/Fellow Faith and Football Director Pompey legend Linvoy Primas was seen dancing at the back and the compere was ex- Crofton student Jez Field, who we had supported when he worked for Tearfund in Kenya.  I thought Jez was a natural and sometime later asked him to play the role of John in our first musical “His Story.”  Although he’d had no acting training he was brilliant – but more of that later.

Focusing on concerts I have rushed ahead somewhat in my story and have omitted to say what happened when I ran out of pop songs to convert to Christian ones – however next week all will be revealed!

Registered Charity No.1077618

I Will Tell from album “I Look Up To The Heavens” featuring Lucy Stimpson. Recorded and produced by John Hodgkinson

I left  the last blog saying  that this week I would tell you how many copies of  our first CD “ I Look Up To Heavens” was sold – well a few more than the 50 my son James predicted!- approximately 3000 which is not exactly a Grammy but still not bad.  Later songs taken from other Mustard Seed CDs were used on 80,000 mini CDs that were attached to the 40^th Anniversary edition of “Every Day With Jesus” and then distributed worldwide, however that’s a future blog story!

I had borrowed money to pay for the duplication of the first 1000 copies of “I Look Up To The Heavens” but was selling more that we needed to cover the monthly repayments. I remember having “that feeling inside” that we should send Katherine Knight some money in Peru. Katherine was the daughter of Paul Knight who introduced me to the Alpha Course (see blog April 3rd) Katherine had taken time off from her studies to work voluntarily in Peru for the Christian agency, ““Latin Link”. She was part of a young team that were helping build two projects, the first of which was an orphanage.

I rang Paul in February 1999 to tell him that CD sales were going well and that I would like to send Katherine £500.00 – in fact they were not going that well – I just felt confident that we would be able to raise that amount.  Paul was obviously delighted and agreed to ring Katherine to tell her the good news. When he made the phone call he did give her a chance to first say anything but went straight into “ I have some great news for you- the sales of “ I Look Up To the Heavens” are going well enough for Ken to send you £500.00.” Paul expected some sort of emotional reaction but not the flood of tears that followed.  Katherine then explained that her team was near the end of their orphanage building project, but all of the materials they needed to complete the work had been stolen. The team were devastated and thought that they would have to abandon the project.   In tears they spent the night in prayer. That had been the previous night – so when Paul told his daughter that £500.00 was on its way, that was indeed a real answer to their prayers,  especially as when the money was converted to local currency it turned out to be the exact amount needed to replace the stolen materials  and so finish the project!!

Sometime later I got a phone call from the father of one of Katherine’s “Latin Link” team saying that he had heard the amazing story of how money received from our CD sales had enabled the orphanage building work to be completed.  He then went on to say that he was a Solicitor who specialised in creating charities and would I like our song writing mission to become a registered charity?  “Yes please ” was the simple answer.  Mustard Seed Songs was not a rocket science title – the parable from Matthew 13 seemed totally appropriate for a project that we felt from a small beginning would grow and grow. So in late 1999 Mustard Seed Songs became Registered Charity No 177618.

I remember someone once saying to me that they became a Christian “Because it works.”  Reading the Bible, prayer, worship, being inspired by other people  and attending church are all important factors in increasing one’s faith but so too are  one’s experiences. By building Memorials and creating Festival Days the Hebrew people helped ensure that they did not forget the blessings of God. The story of how Mustard Seed Songs became a charity is one that I can always look back on to help me strengthen my faith but there are many, many more – some of which I will mention in future blogs. But next week I want to tell you about Mustard Seed Songs’ first ever Concert.  It was held to celebrate Mr Mill’s dad- Mr Milliken’s 90^th birthday and was held in Drama Room 1 at Crofton School.  There were only five of us there – Mr Milliken, Mr Mill, Mr Mill’s sister Joy, Lucy Stimpson and me.  However it was a wonderful concert which could really be called the embryo of  our musical Risen!

Mustard Seed Songs First CD ” I Look Up To The Heavens” featuring Lucy Stimpson – recorded and produced by John Hodgkinson.

“Father Let Your Spirit Fall Upon Me”  featuring Lucy Stimpson from CD ” I Look Up To The Heavens”

So after a couple of weeks of reminiscing over the fantastic Easter Sunday Risen! Concert let me return to the story behind the music of Risen! together with  that of other Mustard Seed concerts and CDs.

When sometime in late 1997 I read in the Holy Rood Church notice sheet that there was a Worship Seminar to be held in Winchester, led by Brian Doerksen,  I had that “feeling” inside again that made me know that this was something I was meant to attend.  One of the many songs that Brian had written was “More than Oxygen” which had been  played at the Service in which I was baptised ( see blog April 17^th)  Brian is from Canada so I knew the opportunities to attend one of his Seminars would be few and far between.

So I went on my own to Winchester – which of course I knew pretty well having been to Teaching Training College there- to a church (now Winchester Family Church) housed in what had been a Cinema.  I have to say I was not entirely comfortable with all the hand raising and that is about all I can remember from the evening apart from the important fact that I thought – “I wonder if my pop songs could become Christian songs – perhaps that is why it was intended that I came to this Worship Seminar? “

So I went home and started “converting” the lyrics of my pop songs to Christian lyrics. For some songs this was relatively easy – only needing for example to change “Baby” to “Lord!” For others it was not so simple, for example “Don’t Lose Sight Of My Shore” became “Father Help Me Acknowledge You” taken from Psalm 139.

So I went to see John Hodgkinson and told him that I wanted to do some recording again. He was fine about that – however I now had to tell him that the songs to be recorded were no longer straight pop songs, with a view to making us money, but Christian songs.   For some reason I was embarrassed about this and so mumbled “John, the words have changed.”  John replied “Why, the words are fine.”  “Yes John but now they are Chris………. words” I did not actually say the word Christian as I had my hand over my mouth so just a muffled “Chris …” came out.  About three times this happened before John could hear the word “Christian.” “That’s fine” he reassured me – so there had been no need  for me to be embarrassed at all.

Next thing was to find a singer. I am sure Louise Redknapp (spelt correctly this time) and Cole (see blog March 20^th) would have sung it but I had just heard Lucy Stimpson sing at the School Prom Karaoke (see blog March 13th) and knew that “she was the one.” So next day I ventured over to the Music Department armed with my cassette of “Don’t Lose Sight Of My Shore.”  After hearing it Lucy said that she would love to record it but why as the previous recording was great. “Ah yes Lucy” I hesitantly explained “But the words have changed.”  “Why, they are great words” insisted Lucy.  “Thanks, but they are now “Chris……. words” I burbled with hand over mouth.  After the regulation three “Chris’s …..” the word Christian came out to which Lucy replied “That’s great I am a Christian.” What no way -this was going too well – what about all the micky taking I was expecting?

I also found out that Lucy not only had a beautiful voice but also played piano brilliantly. Also  that she could play either by reading music  or by ear – and as there was no way that I could ever produce written music Lucy being able to play by ear was just perfect!

So the first CD was born- “ I Look Up To The Heavens.”  The majority of songs being converted pop songs all recorded in John Hodge’s studio in his house.   I remember   “If Love Had Never Died” became “Jesus Is The Alphabet,” “No More Sad Songs” became “Let Us All Stand Up And Be Glad” and “Take My Look, Take My Touch, Take My Whisper”  which I had made up to sing to my son Chris at bedtime  became “Father Let Your Spirit Fall Upon Me.” “I had not made that song up when James, my other son was of an age to be sung to at bedtime – he had to put up with a version of James Taylor’s “Sweet Baby James.”

I remember giving my colleague in the PE Department, Neale Gordon, a cassette with some PE stuff on it not realising it also had a recording of “Father Help Me to Acknowledge You.” I remember Neale saying “What’s all this Father stuff I heard on that cassette you gave me?” I thought “Oh no here comes the micky taking big time” but no, Neale simply said “Well I liked it – anything I can do to help let me know.” And so Neale designed the artwork for our first three CDs and our Mustard Seed logo, created the first Mustard Seed Songs website and was I/C sound for many of our concerts.

When the recording of “I Look Up To The Heavens” was completed in 1999 Lucy, John, Neale and myself went to London to Hiltongrove Studios to have the CD mastered. We made a day of it picking up a West End Show- great times!

James, my son (who I have to say is now really supportive and gives good advice) said to me when we had 1000 CDs of “ I Look Up To The Heavens” reproduced -“Once all the aunties have bought a copy you won’t sell any more – I reckon 50 of  those 1000 CDs will go at best. “

Well for once he was wrong- very wrong – next week I will tell you how many copies of  “I Look Up To The Heavens have been  sold and also how Mustard Seed Songs became a registered charity – and that really  is an amazing story!

I will continue my written blog next week as I  thought this week you might like to see two clips from the Easter Sunday Risen! Concert at Holy Rood.

” I Love You Lord” (Laurie Klein) with  solo from Emily Shaw and “Hallelujah Glory, Glory” (from the musical Risen! ) with solo from Lorraine Marsh. Introductory recitative from  Alex Knox.

“My Jesus My Saviour/Shout to the Lord” (Darlene Zschech) with  solo from Lauren Chappell and introductory recitative from Chloe Brokenshire.

Here are a couple of photos taken from the concert on Sunday, more to follow. (Click on the image to enlarge).

“Woman why are you crying?” featuring Nicola Poustie as Mary Magdalene                          and Ben Morris as Jesus, melody taken from song below-

” I Look Up To The Heavens” from CD of same name, featuring                                              Lucy Stimpson_Maynard

The purpose of my blog is to tell the story behind the music of Mustard Seed Songs and in particular our new musical Risen! As you may know Risen! celebrates the Easter Story and  Joffy Girling and I  have been working on it since 2011

Last week the blog finished with me saying that this week I would tell you how my baptism of 1997 influenced me to write Christian songs. However please forgive me as I want to put that on hold for a week and instead fast forward to April 2014 and Easter Sunday’s Mustard Seed Risen! Concert which took place at Holy Rood Church, Stubbington.

In 2012 the Risen! script was in its infancy but we still  presented a concert comprising those songs that had been completed. This was augmented with Bible passages and praise songs to which the audience were invited to join in such as “When I Survey the Wondrous Cross” and “My Jesus My Saviour.” The evening was fantastic with the church packed full with about 400 people. We raised over £1000.00 for two charities based in the Philippines “Barnabas Ministry of Encouragement www.barnabasministry.co.uk and the “House of the Heroes” www.houseoftheheroes.org

In 2013 we produced a full stage production of Risen! again at Holy Rood. My vision had been for this to be in the same vein as the Les Miserables’ 10^th and 25 Anniversary concerts in which the cast are in costume but who sing from positions behind stationary mics. However about a week before the production I realised that the Les Mis concerts used omni- directional mics so, for example Javert could turn away from the audience to look at Valjean without having to face his mic to be heard. Unfortunately we did not have access to omni -directional mics so we switched to face mics- which meant the cast could no longer “hide” behind stationary mics but would have to move around as in a normal musical. Paul Clements, who is Guildford School of Music and Drama trained, had joined the Risen! cast as a last minute replacement for the role  of Peter. What a God send he was! Paul took over the stage direction and with the help of Nicola Poustie who was  playing Mary Magdalene (Mountview Academy of Theatre Arts trained) and Alex Knox playing John (Guildhall School of  Music and Drama trained) Risen! was transformed in a matter of days from concert format to full stage production.

This taught me to trust God and that when one door closes it is usually because He is opening a much better one.

And such was the case for this Easter Sunday’s Risen! concert. We were beset with problems -our fantastic trumpeter had had his treasured “Smith Watkins” trumpet stolen and so could not play- our wonderful vocal MD was poorly and had to stay in hospital. In addition, with only a few days to the concert, the guy who was to sing the part of Jesus pulled out!

There was no time to find a replacement and so the only option was to use the recording from the forthcoming CD. This recording is sung fantastically well  by Ben Morris who is, at present, playing in the West End’s Phantom of the Opera, however not having a person to play Jesus was a real concern-we had no idea how the audience would react.

Well it turned out that the audience actually enjoyed it better than having someone play the role of Jesus “live.” The voice of Jesus combined with images on the church’s HD screens gave an ethereal feel which was extremely effective and powerful.  It also kept our costs down and we were able to donate £1000.00 to the two charities-  Barnabas Ministry of Encouragement and the “House of the Heroes”

So using the recording of Jesus proved to be a real success but it was the fantastic cast and technical team that really made the evening so memorable. Every single person involved produced performances that held the audience captive and the Easter Story was relived in a most blessed way.

I would like to express my sincere thanks to all who took part and of course to all who came to celebrate with us the Resurrection of Jesus. Also to our two sponsors Banbury Bodyshop of Segensworth South and Hire Cars in Spain of Lee on the Solent.

Next week I will continue where I had left off and explain how the baptism of 1997 led to me writing Christian songs.

Two songs are featured this week.  “I Look Up To The Heavens” which was the first song we recorded after I started writing Christian songs- I  used its melody for two pieces in Risen! – the first being “Woman Why Are You Crying?” sung by Jesus when He meets Mary Magdalene at the tomb early that first Easter Sunday morning.

“In Times of Trouble” featuring Lucy Stimpson- Maynard                                                            with John Hodgkinson on guitar – from Mustard Seed Songs CD “I Look Up To The Heavens”

Many years previously I had been invited by a member of my tutor group- Caroline Berridge I am pretty sure it was- to attend her baptism by full immersion at Holy Rood Church. As she came out of the tank dripping wet in what appeared to be her pyjamas I thought to myself “She is very brave -there is no way you’d catch me doing anything like that – I would be much too embarrassed”  Well as I explained in my  Blog of April 13^th I became a Christian on Feb 22^nd 1997 and not long after I read in the church notice sheet that there was an opportunity for me to be baptised by full immersion.  After a couple of quick enquires I discovered that you can’t be baptised twice. I thought   “That’s a relief I have escaped” – you see I had already been baptised (Christened) as a baby.  The trouble was shortly afterwards I found out that you can still re- affirm your infant baptism vows.

So I got this feeling inside me that made me think that this was something I should do even if I didn’t fancy it.  I thought that as there is safety in numbers I would get others from my Alpha group to be baptised with me- the trouble was none of them wanted to.  So I came up with what I thought was a brilliant plan; I would go to the Holy Land and get baptised in the River Jordan just like Jesus.  With this great plan I went to my mentor, Mr Mill’s dad Mr Milliken expecting him to be overjoyed with my idea. Oh no he was not overjoyed at all – Mr Milliken made it quite clear that I had to make a public testimony of my faith to my friends and family and in my local church.  My mind flashed back to Caroline Berridge’s dunking – this was going to be so embarrassing but I could see no way out. So I went to see the Vicar, Michael Christian- Edwards to tell him that I wished to reaffirm my baptism vows and that I was prepared (prepared but not happy) to give a testimony.

Holy Rood church was packed- I felt the water in the specially brought in tank – it felt less than tepid.  I received encouragement from Mr Mill and his dad, who was going to be my special helper, ready with a towel for me when I emerged; giving what I was sure would be the appearance of a drowned rat.

I remember one of the Christian songs we sang was one written by Brian Doerksen “More than Oxygen” and this became significant a little later re the song writing

Anyway before being “dunked” I had to give a testimony – I thought the best thing would be to tell how my fear of death had been taken away (or pretty much taken away) after I had become a Christian.  Michael Christian- Edwards had pointed out to me that The Book of Hebrews tells us that Jesus has freed all those who were held in slavery by the power of death- so I quoted this. I also talked about how one day I had gone on my own into Holy Rood after dark and a section of the beautiful stained glass window at the far end was illuminated. The illuminated part was that of Jesus portrayed as the Good Shepherd.  I remember staring at this image for some time and feeling really comforted. When I asked how the window had been illuminated no one really had an answer – a timing light was supposed to come on but that was to light the window to the outside – not inside.  There may well be a logical explanation but I prefer to believe it was a blessing from God to reassure me that He would always look after me in the same way as a Shepherd looks after his sheep- even when I got lost or went astray.

After I gave my testimony (which was quite long) someone shouted out “Hallelujah” I remember feeling really chuffed about this – I know I probably should not have felt proud but I did.

So on May 18^th 1997 into the “tub” I went – I was taken backwards into the water by Michael Christian -Edwards.   In the end I wasn’t in the least bit embarrassed  coming out drenched -in fact  I was exhilarated – Mr Milliken was there with a towel and these words for me “So do not fear for I am with you be not dismayed for you are my God I will comfort you and help you I will uphold you with my righteous hand” I later found this to be from the Book of Isaiah Chapter  42:11 These words have remained especially dear to me and when my wife Caroline was baptised in the sea in September 2011  I  said the same  words over her.  They also form part of this week’s featured song “In Times of Trouble” Somehow, and I cannot remember the story exactly, this song was adopted by the son of the Chief of The Karen tribe of Burma – (Myanmar) . These people have long been persecuted.  It also features on the Release International website www.releaseinternational.org.uk

Other people said prayers out loud for me and I particularly remember Paul Knight, who  had first invited me to the Alpha course (see blog April 3^rd) pray that I would become a “Fisher of men”  I felt humbled and joyful – it was a wonderful, unforgettable experience.

Not long after  I heard about a worship seminar being presented by Brian Doerksen – the writer of “More than Oxygen” played at the baptism-  next week I will tell you how that influenced me to start writing Christian songs myself.

The Red Alpha Book “Why Jesus”

“If I Say I Love You Jesus” featuring Lucy Stimpson- Maynard

So last week I was telling you that after that first night on the Alpha course I came back the following week and then the next and the next. I began to think that I wanted to become a Christian – I felt reassured by the words in John’s Gospel, Chapter 3 verse 16 “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life” Eternal Life – that is what I needed to take away my fear of death.  Not something to be earned but something to be accepted as a gift.  Perfect – apart from two problems 1) did I have enough faith to accept Jesus” gift” with any degree of sincerity?  2) If I did ask Jesus into my life what would my mates say- how much ridicule would I have to endure?  Let me have a look at problem no 2 first.

Three of my very special friends are Barry Stares, Dave Conchie and Ian Beacham . Barry I have known since Junior School and Dave and Ian since PE College. We regularly meet for a drink and something to eat (yes curry)  At one curry Ian said “You will never guess what’s happened to Mick” He was referring to another ex-PE College friend, Mick Mellows who played football for Pompey and who is now a Director of the charity Faith and Football -www.faith&football.org.uk .  I thought Ian meant that Mick had been struck down with some horrible illness but no that is not what he meant at all. He continued “He’s only gone and become a Christian!”  To which Dave replied “No – and he was such a good bloke!”

Could I face that sort of comment if I “admitted” to becoming a Christian? I really doubted it.

As for problem no 1 re did I have enough faith? – Well thankfully someone told me I only had to have faith as small as a mustard seed (the smallest of all seeds in Biblical times.)  I simply had to focus on what I believed not on what I did not – simply had to trust – simply had to take a “leap of faith”

During the Alpha course I had been given a little red book entitled “Why Jesus?”  (as featured in pic) At the end of the book there is a prayer so I knew an opportunity was coming up for me to take that leap of faith and to say this prayer asking Jesus to come into my life.  I felt it really difficult to sleep with my two “problems”   constantly churning around inside my head.   The weekend came when I knew I had to make a decision – as part of the Alpha Course I was at the Holy Rood Vicarage with the Vicar, Michael Christian- Edwards and his lovely wife Merlyn.  When the others in my group were having a coffee break I escaped into the village to go through in my head what I was going to do.  On my return sure enough Michael gave everyone the opportunity to say a prayer asking Jesus to forgive us for all the things we had done wrong – to ask Him to come into our lives- and for us to be filled with His Holy Spirit.  I remember asking Michael if I could say the prayer twice.  He seemed surprised but said that was fine and so that lunchtime on Saturday, February 22^nd 1997 I asked Jesus into my life and became a Christian.

Why did I want to say the prayer twice?  Well there was Mr Mill and his dad that I also wanted to be there on such a momentous occasion. So that evening in Mr Mil’s apartment in Titchfield I sat between the two of them confessing out loud all the things I had done wrong and again asking Jesus into my life. Some of the things I had done wrong were pretty big – one had been a real burden for many years but after I had confessed it  the burden lifted- I know that sounds amazing and too good to be true  but amazing is what it was and too good not to be true!

So I thought “micky taking” here you come, but I decided to be  pro-active and tell people before they found out through the grapevine. First off was Barry who I had known the longest -he was surprisingly supportive – so too was Ian – but I could not tell Dave, it was Dave who had made the comment about Mick Mellows – he was sure to let me have it with both barrels.  A couple of months later Barry and Ian told me that Dave was really upset with me for not telling him. So I took Dave out for a curry (of course) and felt pretty emotional when Dave told me that he loved me (in a bloke way!!) and that he would always support me in anything I did and that he was upset because it seemed that I did not believe I could trust him.  So big apology from me and really all the worries about people “taking the mick” turned out to be groundless- mind you I think my two sons James and Chris took a bit of stick at school.

So did my fears of dying die (sorry) If I am honest not entirely – but I did have God’s promise to hold on to and you can’t have much more than that.   In fact later I wrote a song called “It’s From the Lord” which is on our CD “Heart and Soul” – the last verse of which is “When your time on earth is ending and you look up to Him on high and your see His promises sparkling spelt out in stars across the sky and open arms reach to embrace you to welcome you home then you know, yes you know it is the Lord.”

I also wrote a song which was a sort of autobiography of me becoming a Christian and being worried about what people would think – this one is on the CD “Precious” and is called “If I Say I Love You Jesus”  I did actually once sing it live myself at a Mustard Seed Concert but here it is  sung by the fantastic Lucy Stimpson-Maynard.

But I did not start writing Christian songs immediately I became a Christian – that came after a full immersion baptism which I will tell you about next week.

Stop Press– Easter Sunday Risen! Concert – 7.30 pm at Holy Rood Church.  Proceeds to two charities based in the Philippines and run by friends of mine – Barnabas Ministry of Encouragement and The House of The Heroes – Jesus now being played by Andrew Bateup – Royal Academy of Music- Played Levi and Butler in Joseph and Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (2013 tour) – Hear him sing on https://soundcloud.com/andrewbateup

   Alpha Logo

“Who Am I To Judge?” from the Mustard Seed Songs’ musical “His Story.” Sung live by Ron Long and the Mustard Seed Soul Band at the Ferneham Hall, Fareham

So I was knocked out with the simplicity and absolute belief that Mr Milliken (Mr Mill’s dad)  had when he said “Yes”  to my question as to whether his wife, who had died two years previously, was in heaven.  I took Mr Milliken back to his sheltered accommodation in Titchfield,   not too far from the venue for the  Heat Discos and, with my son Chris, listened in awe to his stories of being a Missionary in the Belgium Congo.

The next day I rang Mr Mill to say how amazing I thought his dad was – he of course agreed with me. I told Mr Mill that I felt I wanted to go to Midnight Mass that evening and would he come with me.  Mr Mill said that his church did not do Midnight Mass but that he would go with me to the church near Crofton School – Holy Rood.

Now most Christmas Eves I would be down the local pubs to have more than a few beers with ex- students so I was rather embarrassed about missing out the Red Lion and going “next door.”   However I thought it would be worth it as the heavens would, no doubt, open up for me and I would experience something “spiritual. ” However nothing happened in the service apart from the singing of “Oh Little Town of Bethlehem” and a sermon on the visit of the Wise Men ( I know that does not sound very complimentary to Holy Rood but it does get better I promise!)  At the end of the service a member of Crofton School’s Senior Leadership, Paul Knight, told me he was doing an Alpha Course  (an introductory course on Christianity) and would I like to go. I thought “No Way!”  Paul is now a dear friend and a Trustee of our charity Mustard Seed Songs, but at that time he was simply a member of the Senior Leadership Team so there was no chance of me going to an Alpha course led by him.

All that Christmas holiday I kept bumping into Paul – every time I was invited to a mince pie afternoon he would be there and each time ask the same thing – would I go on an Alpha Course? It turned out that he was not actually leading the course – just attending. He also said that my old mate Paul Hiscock of the Tech department was going so I did soften a bit but not enough to say “Yes.” At the final mince pie afternoon Paul asked me again and exasperated I said “Paul I can’t make Wednesdays – I am coaching Basketball” He replied “It’s on a Tuesday.” I was speechless – I had run out of excuses and so found myself one Tuesday passing the Red Lion and praying (well not really) that I would not be seen going into the Church opposite to my first Alpha night.

I was greeted by a smiling person (obviously a “Do Gooder” I thought) and presented with a badge with my name on it.  I expected everyone to be wearing Jesus sandals and when I saw that someone actually was I decided to beat a hasty retreat.  Paul Hiscock had been trapped by the Vicar so no help there – but then I smelt the curry. Now curry is the staple diet of PE students and teachers so I decided to delay by escape until after I had sampled the curry.

During the Chicken Korma I spoke to a lovely lady called Margaret who asked me what I was doing there and when I had difficulty in answering, reassured me that she too was unsure why she was there.

Tasty curry over – perhaps I should give the Vicar a chance? He looked a pretty cool guy and was not wearing a dog collar – not that I had a problem with that – So here we go to the ice cold pews for a boring sermon on Christ dying for my sins just like my past experiences as a choir boy. Actually no not at all! We went upstairs in the Church Centre to a warm and pleasant room with sofas – all rather nice and relaxing. The Vicar, Michael Christian- Edwards (appropriate name I thought) who has also become a dear friend started off with a joke and quite a good one at that – the laughter relaxed everyone and then Michael talked about whether or not Jesus really did exist. I really enjoyed the talk and even more the opportunity to ask questions afterwards- which I did in abundance. What about this and what about that – Michael answered all my questions with patience and great knowledge. I went home thinking I wonder?  But there was no way really that I could ever become a Christian – what would my mates say?  I would be a laughing stock – “Jesus Freak”  and “Bible Basher.”  However I went back the next week and then the next and then  the next  and then, and then –  well I’ll tell you that in next week’s blog.

Song this week is from our first musical “His Story.”  It is sung by Ron Long who was the “His Story” Stage Director for all our productions until the last one at Ferneham Hall where he switched to performer and sang “Who Am To Judge.”  It is probably the first song that tells a story in the musical theatre genre and so is very much a forerunner for  Risen!